How to ‘be’ this year (or maybe your whole life?)

Happy New Year dear friends,

A little late, but I am happy to be finally writing to you, with my New Year wishes, for you and me.

I am happiest wishing you by sharing the lessons I am taking forward, and here is what I learnt (again!) last year.

Everything was all right in the end (as predicted in my 2013 New Year greeting, based on the famous quote from the movie ‘Best Hotel Marigold’, “Everything will be alright in the end, if it is not alright, it is not the end”).

The ‘end’ was moments, of pure joy, abundant love and happy laughter. Then the moments pass, as moments tend to do.
What was all right, also kept moving, depending on where I was standing (or even fallen!). In order for everything to be all right, I also had to keep moving, till everything (and I) was in balance.

How was everything all right in the end? What were the lessons?

Be patient.
Trust and have faith.
Live with grace and integrity.
Love with heart.
Be in peace.
Be fearless.
Be present, to let go, let come, let be.

Seems familiar? It is to me.

When I read what I have written previously, it is as if I am talking about the same things, year after year. Do I keep repeating the same mistakes, and hence the same lessons? Then, I came across this.

The famous American mythologist Joseph Campbell confesses when compiling his book ‘Myths To Live By’;

“My notion about myself was that I had grown up during that time, that my ideas had changed, and, too, that I had progressed. But when I bought these papers together, they were all saying essentially the same thing – over a span of decades. I found out something about the thing that was moving me. I didn’t even have a very clear idea of what it was until I recognized those continuities running through that whole book. Twenty-four years is a pretty good stretch of time. A lot had happened during that period. And there I was babbling on about the same thing.” (Campbell, 2004, pg xi)

So here I am babbling about the same thing, but as I am in good company I shall continue to fine-tune my learning. In that spirit, I am sending you the same wishes I have for myself.

Ways to ‘Be’ this year (or maybe your whole life?)

Break open your heart.
Those walls? Trample them.
Be foolish. Be brave. Be consciously vulnerable.
Those wounds, those cracks in your heart?
They let in the light. They beam your light out too.
The hurts. The joys. Feel all of them.
That little box you carry your shadow in,
tucked away, where you think no one can see?
Even you forgot where you left it.
Find it. Open it. Shine a light on it.
Where you stand, so does your shadow,
Better to be friends with it.
Be naked. Be wholehearted. Be authentic.

Show your heart.
Show up. Speak your truth.
Even if it changes tomorrow.
Despite your fear of being seen.
Regardless of whether others speak theirs.
In the light of your authenticity and good intentions
Inauthenticity cannot linger too long.
Those who are inauthentic will leave you.
Or you will leave them. Or they will change.
People do change. You will too.
Make space for other’s truth.
Listen. Acknowledge. Appreciate.
Be integrated. Be integral. Be of integrity.

Love boundlessly.
First yourself. Be your rock.
Be full, strong and tall.
Then love others.
Fearlessly. Fiercely. Abundantly.
We are our most human, when we love.
Receive love with gratitude.
Do not be afraid to lean in. Or lean on. Or let in.
Know you are worthy of abundant love.
Be kind. Be loved. Be connected.

Love your body.
Feed it good wholesome food.
Nourish it. Take care of it.
Uncover it. Adorn it. Exercise it.
Speak lovingly to it. Caringly.
To its beauty. It’s strength. It’s vulnerabilities.
This encasing that is you on this earth.
Skin, tissue, muscle, bone, blood.
Run with it. Move. Walk. Work. Play. Rest.
Turn your gaze of gratitude on it.
Revel in the adoring gaze of your beloved.
Be an instrument of love. Enjoy it.
Be pleasured. Be sensuous. Be healthy.

Love your mind.
Inquire. Reflect. Study.
Unlearn. Teach it. Sharpen it.
Don’t forget to use it.
Share it. It will grow more.
Do not live an unexamined life.
Allow quietness to envelop it. Calm it.
Watch out for its tricks. Laugh at them.
Thrive on its dreams. Be Imaginal.
Believe in its limitlessness. Focus it.
Use it wisely. Creatively. Playfully. Seriously.
Be curious. Be expansive. Be mindful.

Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Laugh. A lot. At yourself. With kindness.
Laugh. A lot. With others. With joy.
Take time. With friends. With family.
To connect. To love. To have coffee.
To walk in the woods. To look at the stars.
To hold hands. To sleep in late.
Be silly. Be playful. Be loving.

Remember to give.
Of your time. Your possessions. Of yourself.
To those who ask.
To those who need but are afraid to ask.
Remember to give forgiveness too.
To those who have hurt you. Or trespassed.
Don’t hold anger. Or bitterness.
Just be wise. Know yourself. Know others.
Be generous. Be compassionate. Be human.

You are not in control.
It’s an illusion. Fairy stories you tell yourself.
Plan for God sakes. But don’t be shocked
when the Universe plays cosmic jokes on you.
Life’s a wave. Ebbs and flows. Rises and crashes.
Sometimes you have to wait patiently.
Or plunge right in with wild abandonment.
Or bob along for a while. That’s ok too.
Here’s a secret. YOU are the wave. You are life itself.
Ebbing. Flowing. Rising. Crashing.
You never know which shore you will land on.
Or what offerings it may have.
Be amazed. Be grace. Be present.

I am learning that these are some of the ways to live with heart and with soul, and with wonder and grace, fully engaged, fully alive.

I leave you with a quote that has inspired me right throughout last year and will carry me forward in moments of doubt and life’s inevitable challenges.

“When its over, I want to say; all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom taking the world in to my arms” ~ Mary Oliver

My friends I wish you abundant joy and love. I wish you brave and playful dreams, and daring courage to pursue them and resilient spirit to stay the course. May you find grace and wonder even in the smallest of life’s moments.

Have am amazing 2014!

With love and blessings





  • Lalith Gunaratne
    Posted January 11, 2014 9:24 pm 0Likes

    love all yo poems eM – especially You are In Control as we stepped out to ice covered everything,- a skating rink just outside our door this morning…. Happy New of Peace and Contentment – Change is the only thing we are sure of………. love

    • Mihirini De Zoysa
      Posted January 12, 2014 5:54 am 0Likes

      Thank you eL … change sure is the thing we can always count on, and we must count on our resilient spirit! Wishing you and everyone at home, all of life’s blessings, love and hugs, eM x

      • Rosh
        Posted January 31, 2014 2:43 pm 0Likes

        Thank you Mihirini for those insights. Its stuff we are know but need to be constantly reminded of so thank you. Happy New Year and God Bless x

        • Mihirini De Zoysa
          Posted January 31, 2014 3:34 pm 0Likes

          Many thanks for your feedback Rosh. Wishing you an abundant and joyful New Year.

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